Let Your Genie Out!
Have you ever felt suppressed? Why do you think that happened? Was it to help you work in your organization; was it because you are different; or something else? You have qualities that make you YOU! How is it that they have been put in a bottle and the cork is snuggly put in the top? There are strengths and the wonderful power you have – your magic. This magic makes you different from others and truly resonates with who you are. How is it that these skills are capped in the bottle?
Has someone you work for, work with, or are close to suggested (sometimes quite strongly and without your full permission) that you stop doing something that is integral to you? Have they suggested that you act and do things differently? What is the source of the suggestion or demand? Do you know why or understand? The stories we incorporate from what others say, or we tell ourselves may make us less unique and powerful. And, that may be the goal. Why would that be?
In some instances these characteristics are capped because they don’t conform to the culture of the organization or people around you. I often work with clients who feel subdued to me. It is almost as if, in an attempt to “fit” or “comply,” their luster has dulled. When we work together, I seek their passions, their fire, that magic. Then, when it shows up they are truly powerful and magical. The energy that they bring to the situation and challenge now is aligned with them. As a result they find the “right job,” have a fulfilling conversation, and show the value they bring.
I’ve had similar experiences. I am a strong extrovert and gain energy by being with people and sharing ideas out loud. During a performance review, my two bosses asked me to be more quiet and stop expressing thoughts out loud. They said it was disruptive because most of my colleagues were introverts. Me, being the “rule-follower,” began to say less and remain quiet during discussions among our executive team. It felt like my genie had been stuffed in the bottle and the cap put on. (Did you ever watch “I dream of Jeannie”? When Jeannie was put back in the bottle, she’d sit in her bottle and fume!) Subsequently, in my next performance review the same bosses asked if I felt intimidated by the executive team because I wasn’t contributing. Hrmph! I told my bosses that I was confused because they had requested this new behavior. They didn’t recall that request. All of us were confused.
When those moments arrive, when you are asked to put the genie back in the bottle or you are asking someone else to do that, I hope you will seek clarity. In my own situation, it would have been more powerful to seek information about the context, impacts, and trade-offs for the group and me. Without the conversation, each of us thought we knew what was expected and why.
The richness of our differences could create new ideas and innovation if the team can bring those dimensions together. Hmmm?! Wouldn’t that be powerful! Initially, it might be uncomfortable, but spending time there may help your team and you move to a greater, more innovative place. Then, the unique you and team members can create a concoction that is more powerful than it would be if it is created by “like-thinkers and -behavers.”
Enjoy the MAGIC!
